7 Benefits Of Reading Other People’s Blogs

Why you should read blogs

The whole experience of blogging is not about you churning out posts after posts for people to read, to like, to comment on and to share. It is also about you reading other people’s blogs and interacting with them as much as you can.

There are many benefits you will derive by reading other people’s logs. In this post, I will highlight seven of such benefits.

7 Benefits of reading other people’s blogs


1. You learn from other people

People share ideas, experiences and insights on their blogs. They do so not for self-amusement but for you to read them. You will learn as you read those sites.

As one of my readers once stated, “What I love about blogging is taking the time to read other people’s thoughts about faith stuff as its important to get perspectives different from my own.”

Every opportunity you have to read is an opportunity to learn something new or remind you of something’s you have forgotten.

Be honest with yourself for once: you don’t know everything. That’s why you should read what other people have written on their blogs so that you can know what they know.

2. You discover new blogs to follow.

People follow your blog and you should follow other people’s blogs too. Reading other blogs will help you determine whether or not to  follow such blogs.

There are many reasons I may not have followed some blogs. But reading other people’s blogs helps me to discover suitable ones to follow.

Although there were some blogs I followed at first sight (especially the ones recommended to me), my guiding principle is that I would need to read two or three posts on any blog before I make the affirmative decision to hit the follow-button.

3. You sharpen your writing skills.

Writers do not only write, they read a lot as well. By extension, as a blogger, in addition to updating your own blog, you should also read blogs other than yours and learn from the writing styles employed by the authors of such blogs.

Personally, I learn a lot from reading other people’s posts. Just like many WordPress users, I did not attend any training on blogging before I got started. Everything I know, I have learnt from reading what other people have written and putting them into practice.

getting people to read your blog

4. You attract more followers to your blog.

“One good turn deserves another” they say. If you want people to read your posts, you too should read other people’s posts.

There is a great chance that if you add value to a blog as you read it – by leaving a comment for instance – you are likely to attract more followers to your own blog.

5. Opportunity to interact with fellow bloggers.

For you to comment on a post, you have to read it first. I would expect that you don’t want to comment on a post you haven’t read.

Essentially, a post is someone’s idea or opinion about something, somebody or some place. Your comment on the post will be your own response to it.

You could also respond to other people’s comments on the post, thereby expanding the sphere of interactions.

6. Community, fellowship and friendship.

As you interact with other bloggers, you form a kind of bond and friendship that might prove valuable to you. Some of your online or blogging friends may eventually turn into your friends in real life.

And when someone becomes your real life friend, the opportunities become limitless. I shared my little experience in this regard when I published From a blog friend to a real life friend.

7. Source of blog ideas

Apart from the new things you learn by reading other blogs, you might also receive inspiration for new posts on your blog. I have experienced this several times.

As I read other people’s blogs, there seems to be a spark of inspiration that comes from it. And I have developed many of such thoughts into full-fledged posts on this blog.


What other benefits do you get from reading blogs other than yours? Leave a comment.


© Copyright 2018| Victor Uyanwanne

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Words Of Commendation From My English Teacher From Way Back

Friendship with your teacher

Every once in a while we are able to remember those who positively impacted our lives in one way or another. The last weekend afforded me such an opportunity, and it is my pleasure to share the story with you in this post.

I returned from Church last Sunday feeling very physically exhausted and I decided to take a little nap on my bed. As usual my smart phone was handy, so in the interim I began to surf through my messages and social media notifications.

In the process, I came across one message from Facebook informing me that, “Victor, you and G are celebrating one year of friendship on Facebook.”

Just like any other Facebook user, I know this type of message is a common one. But this very one meant a lot to me because the G in question is someone I have held in very high esteem ever since I was a teenager.

“…One year of friendship”?

Really?

I had chuckled as I read the message because although I recently reconnected with this awesome person via Facebook, we had known each other for more than two decades – long before Mark Z ever thought of gifting the world with his pervading social media platform.

Apart from once being a spiritual mentor to me way back in Secondary school, He was my English teacher at some points too. Needless to say, I owe a lot to him and to other people like him for the good foundation they laid for me while learning English as a second language.

For those of you who don’t know, English is the official language in Nigeria my home country. (Thanks to Britain, once our colonial master). But we usually learn it as a second language, after our mother tongue. And now it is a compulsory subject in both primary and secondary schools across the nation.

Teacher-Student relationship

So this friendship notification from Facebook made me share the following message on my Facebook wall in celebrating the English Teacher from way back that so much impacted my life. (I’m sure he doesn’t mind my mentioning his name):

I celebrate you sir, Geoff Uti. You were an English Teacher like no other, to me. There is no doubt that I drew inspiration from both your spoken and written English.

Wherever you are right now, I’m giving you a shout out. Today, Facebook notice says we are celebrating one year as friends. But I will let the world know that I have known you for almost 3 decades. God bless you sir. May your legacies remain forever.

What happened next after I wrote the above words on my FB wall gave me the reason to share this post with you.

Although I did not expect it, I was pleasantly surprised to see a comment or response from this rare teacher. I felt humbled, or I should say honoured, by his words of commendation so I decided to share them with you here as well:

Friendship they say is not proximity but trust and fulfilment. Going back nostalgic to the days of yore when you exuded great intelligence and ingenuity academically, one is forced today to let the world know that you are a rare gift to your generation.

A figure par excellence in whom I am always well pleased and of whom the school was proud of, you are one of the rewards of the profession I am proud to belong.

A product that has today put me on the globe even when I would not have been worth it without the likes of you. You have remained a goal-getter and the sky is your stepping stone.

Your dearness to me will flourish the more as our friendship is beyond that of Teacher- Student but to father-son relationship.

All I could say after reading those sweet words was ‘wow.’ Thank you sir for this honour!

Do you have any teacher who you would never forget for the impact he made on you? Any comments?

©Copyright 2018|Victor Uyanwanne

Remembering the Enduring Love of a Couple-Friend

Victorscorner

I just stumbled on this personal picture featured here and it brought back wonderful memories that precipitated this post.

I remember the day I snapped it exactly 3 years ago. It was at the church wedding of a very close friend.

The wedding took place at a location far away from my Lagos base. But I had to be there, irrespective of the distance.

The friend deserved the love and support I had to give, even more.

We are friends. We have been friends. We have come along way with each other and for each other as well.

There was a lot of significance to that wedding. The enduring love of the couple for instance: They loved each other against all odds. Believed in each other. Courted each other for several years. Planned being with each other for life…for better or worse.

But there were pockets of challenges here and there before the wedding – all through the courtship period – chief of which was that their families opposed the marriage.

However, in the end, the patience and the love of the couple paid off; they eventually got parental blessing for the wedding and the marriage was allowed to take place.

I was glad I was there to witness it all. I was glad that their love triumphed over all obstacles, giving all glory to God who made all things possible.

In more ways than one, I had a personal sense of fulfilment over that wedding. Mission accomplished for the couple; joy for all of us friends and family.

Even in times of doubts before the marriage, I stood with my friend and his love. Though a long tedious journey, it came to a beautiful climax: united in holy matrimony, against all odds.

I saw it coming. I prayed with them. It seemed impossible at first but it still took place in the end – happily.

Uyanwanne V.
Going for the Wedding

When I was setting out for that wedding event, I took two days off work to enable me arrive the location ahead of time. The traditional wedding was for a Friday afternoon while the white wedding was to take place the following Saturday.

I was well prepared for the wedding. I bought a brand new pair of suit for the occasion, along side the accompanying accessories.

I was happy… I was longing to see my friend walk the aisle with his bride. A big day, it would turn out be!

On a Thursday, the day to the Friday of the traditional wedding ceremony, I arrived at the inter state bus terminal not too far from my Lagos home to begin this important journey I had looked forward to for at least three months prior.

It was midday, so I had said to my self, “In the next 5-6 hours on the road, I should be with my friend ready to cheer him on as he bade goodbye to bachelorhood.”

You know that feeling you have when someone you love is celebrating! I felt it and I felt good about it…

My close friend from way back was getting married. I had to be there in flesh and blood, with all pleasure.

Some years ago when I got married, he was with me all the way. He flew in to Abuja into my waiting arms. And then together we flew further to Sokoto where he joined me to pick my beautiful bride.

I still remember how we felt when the plane touched down at the Sadiq Abubakar III International Airport.

“So Victor you are getting married?” he had asked me. You see what I mean when I say we have come along way?

“Yes” was my heartfelt response to him. “It is my turn now, it will be yours soon,” sounding very sure of the future.

As we stepped out from the air-plane then, we were both greeted by the dry very winds of the North West and the scorching Sun of the seat of the Caliphate, with temperatures measure reaching the 40″C mark.

I had never felt so much heat before my life. But it was all well and good: I got married in Church as planned without any hitches, whatsoever!

Now it’s this friend’s own wedding, and my mind was already made up  about being there. “I have to be there by all means,” I had promised myself.

And the day finally came!

There were no direct flights to the local town venue of the wedding; no airport there in the first place. So the journey had to be done by road. And I was ready to take it on, joyfully and wholeheartedly!

There was the option for me to fly to the nearest airport located at the State Capital, some kilometres away from the place, and taxi inwards to the venue. But my budget was very tight, so that idea flew away from my head as quickly as it had come.

In the end, I had to travel by road. I didn’t even see it as a sacrifice even though I had to travel several rough miles to attend the marriage ceremony. Like I said earlier, I was still happy doing it.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get there until the Friday of the traditional marriage ceremony proper. In fact I arrived in the middle of the ceremony, with friends and family already seated,  appropriately dressed in colourful attires.

The event was peaceful and successful. And on the following Saturday, my friend and his bride were joined in holy matrimony to begin their life together as man and wife. I thank God, I witnessed it all.

Rewind a day backwards

As you might have observed, I arrived a day later than I had planned to. The late show up was due to a setback in transportation the day before.

That Thursday when I got to the bus park, I bought my fare ticket and sat down on the public bus waiting for the journey to begin. The waiting turned from minutes to hours, and we were still there. Not enough passengers for the bus to depart the terminal.

At the end of the day, I couldn’t continue the journey same day, else I would have to get there at very late hours. And that’s not good enough, for security reasons.

I departed from the bus park for home, forfeiting my fares – as they insisted there would be no refunds.

But I had still had to make that journey. So I shifted it to the following Friday morning. This time, I switched Inter State bus terminal.

Thankfully I didn’t have to wait for too long. So the journey began and to the glory of God, I arrived safely for the wedding, stayed with my friend as he took his bride to the altar. And together we all savoured the joy of the couple that had the enduring love that conquered all odds.

©Copyright 2018 | Victor Uyanwanne

2017 in Review: Top 10 Posts on this Blog

10 best posts in 2017

Based on the posts with the highest number of likes, here are the summaries of the top 10 posts on this blog in 2017:

#10. Communication in Marriage: 4 Super Lessons in a Surprising Way

As much as possible, you should endeavour to maintain a good communication flow with your spouse. That means you have to promptly take care of anything trying to impede appropriate communications with your spouse. Failure to do so may later lead to sad moments or other unpleasant consequences which you would not like.

Need for healthy communication in marriage

  1. In a thorny situation, your spouse is not the thorn.
  2. If your spouse wears an unusual outlook, you as the other half should show persistent care (by asking) to find out what the problem is.
  3. If your spouse slows down in communicating with you, that’s not the time for you to withdraw from him or her.
  4. Be strong for your spouse by whispering to him or her that you are there for him or her.

#09. Share A Smile With Me

This was a post for my birthday. I went poetic saying:

Birthday party picture

…I was born for a purpose
There is no doubt about it.
No matter what life & time propose.
I will never ever quit…

#08. How You can Know God At The Friendship Level

There are “three levels of knowing God: recognition, acquaintance, and friendship.” To know someone deeply, you have to regularly talk to, or spend time with, him or her. 

Knowing God deeply is not different from that. Except you are willing to regularly fellowship with God, talk to Him as a friend and let Him talk to you too, you may never get to know Him at the deepest level possible.

#07. Finding The Friend That Sticks Closer Than A Brother 

We can always find a friend in the Lord Jesus,
Who has promised He’ll always be there for us.
Whatever we go through in this time and space,
We can get succour by looking unto His face.

Best friends forever

#06. Towards A Better Marriage: Your Spouse Is Not The Problem. 

Except you are married to the devil personified, I am free to say that your spouse is not the problem in your marriage. So resist the temptation to see him or her as one.

A vital key to amicably resolving the challenges between you and your spouse is to learn to focus on tackling the issue at hand rather than putting the blame on a person – your partner.

You may have been hurt by what your spouse said or did at some point, but the problem is still not your spouse. A problem is a problem and your spouse is your spouse. Please don’t mistake one for another.

#05. 16 Sobering Things Every Atheist Should Know

I can’t force anyone to believe in God. But I can at least let them know some things that may help them make up their mind in the affirmative. After all, acknowledging Jesus Christ as one’s Lord and personal Saviour remains a decision everyone has to take by him/herself. So if you are an atheist, here are some sobering truths I wish you to know:

What are you if you say there is no God?

  • Jesus Christ is the only Way to God.
  • You are not the first person to doubt the existence of God.
  • The Bible has a word for anyone who doesn’t believe there is God…FOOL.
  • There have been people who turned from atheism to God and so can you.
  • Your lifetime is your only opportunity for you to know God.
  • Whatever misgivings you have about God can be handled.
  • God has numerous children and He has room for you too.
  • If you die today, where would you spend eternity?

#04. A Broken Piece of Heart

Shattered piece of heart

… For many years, I went about my life
With a broken piece of heart, bleeding.
No one could fill the great void I felt
Or mend the awfully shattered part of me.

But then I met the greatest Friend and Lover
Who truly loved me as I am, unconditionally.
The One who gave up His life for me
And gave me a brand new heart too.

#03. Jesus: 8 Special Things About The Baby That Changed The World.

In His birth, divinity became humanity. It was the beginning of the unfolding of the grandest heavenly agenda in bringing salvation to mankind. Here are some of the things that proved Jesus was not an ordinary person:

Unique things about the birth, life, death and resurrection of Jesus.

  1. Jesus’ miraculous conception by a virgin.
  2. His conception by a virgin and birth were undeniable fulfillment of Prophecies.
  3. Jesus got His name several centuries before He was born.
  4. He wasn’t born to earthly royalty, but angels heralded His birth.
  5. The birth of Jesus is the proof of God’s love for the world.
  6. Jesus was born to die.
  7. Jesus is the only man in history with the complete tripartite cycle of birth, death and resurrection.
  8. He is the only one giving eternal life to anyone who believes in Him.

#02. 6 Simple Reasons To Forgive Offences

Everyone needs forgiveness.  On the other hand, everyone needs to offer forgiveness too. Here are 6 simple reasons you should learn to forgive others:

Benefits of forgiveness

  1. God has forgiven your offences and He expects you to forgive others too.
  2. Unforgiveness is a big weight, free yourself from it.
  3. Don’t you expect others to forgive you too?
  4. Happiness and unforgiveness don’t mix.
  5. You have the capacity to forgive, no need pretending otherwise.
  6. Forgive yourself so you can forgive others.

#01. 8 Simple Reasons I Do Not Follow Your Blog

Part of the joy of blogging is having people following your blog, regularly reading your written thoughts and sending you feedbacks through their comments, likes, emails, reblogs etc. If you have ever wondered why people are not following your blog, then you have to check out the post.

Based on my own experience, the post was used to highlight 8 possible reasons, just like some other people, I have not been following your blog:

Why people follow your blog

  1. I don’t even know that your blog exists in the first place.
  2. You are not following my blog.
  3. I got to your blog, but your posts care less about my core values.
  4. The first three posts I read on your blog did not make much sense to me.
  5. Your picture is not on your profile.
  6. You did not join any blogging community.
  7. Your blog language is totally different from mine.
  8. No one has recommended your blog to me yet.
Thank you for reading. Please feel free leave A comment and share the post.

Ideas For Open Letter: The OffShoots

Open letter ideas

Have you ever written an open letter? was a post published on this blog to sensitise readers on the need to consider writing open letters. This was later followed by 20 simple ideas for open letter as the offshoot.

In that post, a list of 20 possible areas you could write an open letter on were suggested, with a challenge to readers to explore the topics by writing open letters (on their blogs).

Amongst other things, the post had suggested that you could write an open letter to:

  • Your future spouse (if you are not yet married)
  • A friend with whom you have lost contact.

These two areas of suggestions have been further explored by some of my readers who took up the challenge and acted upon them. In this post, I am sharing those posts and their author’s blogs with you for your further engagement with them.

First to respond was Lisa, who thought the ideas I suggested for open letters were good. As she stated in her comment-response to the open letter post, she journals every night. And as a result of the open letter challenge, she has decided to start writing some journals specifically for her future spouse as well.

“… I will keep a separate journal” says Lisa, “for my future husband – letting him know I am praying for him . For his joys , for his sad days & his dreams.”  You can visit Lisa’s blog, The Whisper Within blog for more interactions with her.

Just like Lisa, another follower, Tikeetha of A Thomas Point of View, was also thinking about her future husband when she read the 20 simple ideas for open letter. But she is not keeping a daily journal for him like Lisa did. Rather, as recommended, she went the full hog by writing an open letter, 5 Things I need Babe, to her would-be spouse. I enjoyed reading the post and so would you, if you would check it out.

As an introduction to her said post, Tikeetha had graciously informed her readers that “… my friend Victor at Victor’s Corner wrote a post encouraging you to write an open letter and describing the different types of open letters you could write and I decided to do one. I thought about what kind of letter I would write and I knew that I wanted to write an open letter to my future husband…  I wanted to let you (and him) know the 5 things I need for our marriage.” So feel free to visit Tikeetha’s blog, for more inspiring posts from her.

Another offshoot of the open letter challenge was a piece titled, open letter to the girl who left us for her (not so great) boyfriend by Mikayla. In that post, she expressed a loving concern for an estranged friend of hers whom she said had left her and her other friends to pursue a relationship that might not augur well for her.

Although Mikayla is a newbie on WordPress, her written words are deep and thoughtful enough to teach you one or two things. You may follow her at Miksbullshitblog .

As I conclude this post, I’ll like to express my profound appreciation to my followers mentioned above for taking up the challenge to publish an open letter along the recommended lines. By doing so, they have expanded the conversation and also enriched the reading experiences of their blog followers.

In case, there is another offshoot post to the open letter challenge by any reader that I have not acknowledged, kindly bring it to my attention so we can also give our support too by engaging in the conversation.

 

© Copyright 2017| Victor Uyanwanne

2016 In Review: Top 10 Posts On This Blog

 

10 most liked post
10 Most Liked Posts On Victorscornerdotorg.wordpress.com in 2016

Based on the posts with the highest number of likes, here are the summaries of the top 10 posts on this blog in 2016:

 # 10. Towards A better Marriage: 6 Simple Reasons You Should Not Blame Your Spouse

  • When you blame your spouse for everything that goes wrong in your marriage, you paint the false picture that you are perfect.
  • You hurt your spouse’s feelings when you heap the blame on him/her every time, without taking any responsibility yourself.
  • You risk being resented by your spouse if you continue the blame game.
  • As you already know, you will not be able to build a happy and healthy relationship with anyone if you blame or resent him/her a lot.
  • Blaming your spouse does not solve the problem in your marriage.
  • Treat your spouse the way you want to be treated.

# 9. Can Unhappy Parents Raise Happy Children?

I want to be a happy father to my children and a happy husband to my wife. After all, a grumpy man would not make a good companion to anyone – family or not family. This is part of the reason I have realised that I should strive to always have my emotions under control…

It seems logical to think that unhappy parents may not be able to raise happy children. And I don’t want to be caught in that web.

#8. How You Can Know God At The Friendship Level

Distinguished and best-selling Author, Rick Warren, in one of his devotional articles, stated that there are three levels of knowing God: recognition, acquaintance, and friendship.

To know someone deeply, you have to regularly talk to, or spend time with, him or her. Knowing God deeply is not different from that. Except you are willing to regularly fellowship with God, talk to Him as a friend and let Him talk to you too, you may never get to know Him at the deepest level possible.

#7. Communication in Marriage: 4 Super Lessons In A Surprising Way

Various situations could arise in your marital relationship that may want to force a communication gap between you and your spouse. But don’t allow for a breakdown in communication between you both. If communication fails, many other things will fail along.

  • In a thorny situation in your marriage, know that your spouse is not the thorn.
  • If your spouse wears an unusual outlook, you as the other half should show persistent care (by asking) to find out what the problem is.
  • If your spouse slows down in communicating with you, that’s not the time for you to withdraw from him/her.
  • Be strong for your spouse by whispering to him/her that you are there for him/her

#6. Jesus: 8 Special Things About The Baby That Changed The World

Jesus was more than a baby. He is the God-incarnate. As the Saviour of the world, in Him lies the eternal hope of mankind. Here are some special things about Him that set Him apart from any other man in recorded history:

  • Jesus’ miraculous conception by a virgin.
  • His conception by a virgin and birth were both undeniable fulfilment of Prophecies.
  • He wasn’t born to earthly royalty, but angels heralded His birth.
  • The birth of Jesus is the proof of God’s love for the world.
  • Jesus was born to die.
  • Jesus is the only man in history with the complete tripartite cycle of birth, death and resurrection.
  • He is the only one giving eternal life to anyone who believes in Him.

#5. Finding The Friend That Sticks Closer Than A Brother

There’s one thing I have come to know.
Many friends will always come and go.
Their going away may not be caused by strife.
It is a normal phenomenon of this life…

We can always find a friend in the Lord Jesus,
Who has promised He’ll always be there for us.
Whatever we go through in this time and space,
We can get succour by looking unto His face

#4. Towards A Better Marriage: Your Spouse Is Not The Problem

A problem is a problem and your spouse is your spouse. Please don’t mistake one for another.

Next time you have any marital issue, be sure to remind yourself that your spouse is not the problem. Identify what the issue is and focus on tackling it.

#3. Sixteen Sobering Things Every Atheist Should Know

If you don’t want to end up in the wrong destination, you should not continue on the journey in the wrong direction. The prodigal son found his back to his father, so can you! If you are an atheist, here are 16 sobering truths I wish you to know:

  • God exists – whether you believe it or not.
  • To know God, check the Bible
  • God loves you, I thought you should know.
  • God is not angry with you.
  • Jesus Christ is the only Way to God.
  • You are not the first person to doubt the existence of God.
  • The Bible has a word for anyone who doesn’t believe there is God…FOOL.
  • There have been people who turned from atheism to God and so can you.
  • Your lifetime is your only opportunity for you to know God.
  • Whatever misgivings you have about God can be handled.
  • God has numerous children and He has room for you too.
  • If you die today, where would you spend eternity?
  • The problem of sin cannot be solved except in Christ Jesus.
  • You are accountable to God, now or later.
  • There is a future reality called Hellfire, for everyone who rejects Jesus.
  • Very far from God is not too far yet.

#2. A Broken Piece of Heart

For many years, I went about my life
With a broken piece of heart, bleeding.
No one could fill the great void I felt
Or mend the awfully shattered part of me…

But then I met the greatest Friend and Lover
Who truly loved me as I am, unconditionally.
The One who gave up His life for me
And gave me a brand new heart too.

#1. Six Simple Reasons To Forgive Offences

Everyone needs forgiveness.  On the other hand, everyone needs to offer forgiveness too. Here are 5 simple reasons you should learn to forgive others:

  • God has forgiven your offences and He expects you to forgive others too.
  • Unforgiveness is a big weight, free yourself from it.
  • Don’t you expect others to forgive you too?
  • Happiness and unforgiveness don’t mix.
  • You have the capacity to forgive, no need pretending otherwise.
  • Forgive yourself so you can forgive others.

 

Thank you for reading. Please feel free to comment.

©CopyRight 2017 | Victor Uyanwanne

You Are Not A Friend, If …

You are not a friend

If you take pleasure in celebrating my errors more than my excellence, you are not a friend.

If you delight in talking down on me and you never get to talk about my good qualities, you are not a friend.

If you see me on the road to hell and you secretly wish that I go through it to the end, you are not a friend.

If you rejoice when I am sad and you are unhappy when I succeed, you are not a friend.

If you paint me well in my face and you stab me at my back, you are not a friend.

If my joy makes you sad and my cry makes you smile, you are not a friend.

If you believe when they tell you I am bad and you doubt when they say I am good, you are not a friend.

If you love me when I see you and you hate me when I don’t see you, you are not a friend.

If you stay close when the weather is fair, but you run away when I’m in a storm, you are not a friend.

If you say ‘cheers’ in my face and you say ‘jeers’ at my back, you are not a friend.

If you call me when you need me and you don’t answer when I call you, you are not a friend.

If you wish that I fall so that I cannot rise above you, you are not a friend.

If you hate to love me or love to hate me you are not a friend.

If you always tell me sweet lies instead of the bitter truth, you are not a friend.

If you see nothing good in me and neither think greatness of me, you are not a friend.

If you see me take poison and you urge me on with pleasure, you are not a friend.

If you vilify me in order to make you appear a hero, you are not a friend.

If you lie against me to make you look good, you are not a friend.

If you share in all my secrets, but you never share any of yours with me, you are not a friend.

If you think ill of me and never wishes me well, you are not a friend.

Someone is not your friend, if ……?

Share your thoughts in the comment section.

How You can Know God At The Friendship Level

Rick Warren's 3 levels of knowing God

Two kinds of people in the world

There are two kinds of people on Earth:

  • Those who believe that God exists; and
  • those who don’t.

Amongst those that believe God exists, whether they do know God to the extent of having or contemplating a friendship relationship with Him is a different thing altogether.

Continue reading

Birthday offering: How I met my wife

Where I met my spouse

Last March was my fifth wedding anniversary. As I continue to celebrate the privilege of being married to one of God’s special princesses, it is my pleasure to let you in on how, or better still where, I met her.

You can consider it my birthday offering to you on this special day of mine. Today is my birthday. Ooops, I guess I had to let you in on that!

I have always known that I would one day write about how I met my wife. But I didn’t know that that day would come so soon.

Something happened that made it come sooner than I had thought. During an online search recently, I stumbled on a comment I had made in the past on a Nigerian online forum.

The comment was my response to the topic of the post which was simply a question entitled, ‘Where did you meet your spouse?’ To be honest, I was pleasantly surprised to read the response again.

Here we go:

I met her in church. We became friends. Just friends, serving God faithfully in [the] youth ministry [of our church].

Later, my heart began to skip a bit for her. The mere thought of her brought smiles to my heart.

At first, I felt concerned that I was taking the friendship [further] more than I had thought.

“What is wrong with me?” I asked myself.

I prayed about it. I got the assurance that all was well. I told her I loved her and would want to marry her. [It] turned out she was convinced about me too.

Two years later, she became my wife and has been so [five] years now. We have been happy ever after. I thank God for everything.

Although it was an impromptu response I made back then, reading it again now made me feel that I gave an appreciably good summary of where and how I met my wife. This it was that precipitated this post.

So allow me to delve a little more into the full story.

We met in church

I have heard stories of people meeting their spouses in all kinds of places. Even though my mind was open as to where I could meet my would-be-wife, I would consider it a blessing that I met her in Church.

There was this joke back then that if you are looking for a decent girl for a wife then look for her in the church. Whether that’s necessarily true or not, I leave that to you to decide.

Then, I wasn’t particularly sure about where I could meet my would-be-spouse. But I was very sure about who she should be.

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I was convinced she would be someone who had made a strong commitment to God, through a personal relationship with Jesus as Lord and Saviour. Someone who was committed to living her life on Earth to the glory of God and for the benefit of mankind, with eternity in view.

Of course, there were other things I considered, but the above mentioned were not negotiable. It is possible to find such a blessed lady in any possible place around the world. But as God would have it, my church in Lagos was my lucky place.

Our Friendship was healthy

We were individually actively involved in the Lord’s service.  I was the Bible Study coordinator of our Church’s Youth Fellowship and later the Vice President of the group. On her part, she was an active voice in the Youth choir as well as in the main Church choir.

Our friendship developed gradually and blossomed into a very close one. It flourished on a platonic level or what we could describe in Nigerian parlance as just “a brother and a sister in Christ” relationship. Nothing more until love began to set in….

We moved from friendship to love.

Oh the innocent ‘boy’ has fallen in love. You know that feeling of fallen in love? I felt it strongly then. But I was a bit concerned.

“Why would I want to bring ‘love’ into our heavenly friendship and ruin everything?” I had asked myself.

We had mutual respect and trust for each other. We knew the boundaries we set for ourselves. Besides, I never thought I would marry a friend.

But instead of the awesome feeling of love going away, it became strengthened in my heart and louder in my ears. I was glowing! But I was careful not to let her know how I was feeling yet.

“I must do something about it,” I challenged myself.

I cross-checked everything with my Father in Heaven. I believe in prayer; it helps me clarify my thoughts.

“Oh God my Father, do you have a hand in this strong splurge of love I feel in my heart for Your daughter, Jenny?’ I had asked God in prayer.

‘Yes’ was the answer I received in my heart from the still small voice. Once, I knew God was involved, my worries ceased; peace and divine assurance filled my heart.

“One more thing Lord, she is your daughter too.” I pointed out to God – as if He didn’t already know. “Please speak to her about ‘us’. Prepare her heart for this eternal love you have told me I am going to share with her.”

The feeling was mutual.

Not long afterwards, it became clear to me that my prayers had been answered. God had put my love in her heart just as He had put her love in mine. We were ‘flowing’ with each other.

We each knew where God was pointing us to, and we were ready to go with Him all the way to the marriage altar.

The proposal.

I waited till I perceived the time was right to pop the question.

‘Will you marry me?’ I asked her after 9 months down the line.

‘Yes, I will’ was the heavenly response I got from her.

Thus, our courtship officially began. I am grateful, she didn’t make me wait any longer before giving me her consent.

“Give me some more time” some other lady may have said to me. But not my sweet Love, she was prepared for me as I was ready for her. Fifth wedding anniversary

Marriage altar here we come.

Two years afterwards, we both stood before God’s holy altar and echoed “I do, I do” to each other, as we were pronounced husband and wife.

It’s been five years since then. And we are still counting …

I met my wife in Church. I have no doubts that God arranged it that way. That’s my story.

Would you share a little about how you met your spouse?

 

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