Has Your Blog Post Ever Spoken To You Personally?

You can learn from your own post too!

Many of us bloggers sometimes make the mistake of thinking that we are writing only to people other than ourselves; that our posts help our readers more than they help us the writers.

But that may not always be the case. The posts we publish can be a blessing to us as much as it is to our readers. They can address our needs as much as they address the needs of other people.

Your blog posts should interest you. They should minister to you if you want them to minister to other people too.

That’s why I’m asking you: have you ever had your blog speaking to you personally?

In other words, have you ever learnt any lesson reading your own blog post?

That seems a fair question to ask, because if you are not learning anything from your own blog post, how are your readers supposed to learn from it?

I know from my own experience that most of the things I write on this blog often speak to me directly before they speak to my readers.

Apart from what I learn from other people’s posts, I learn from my own posts too!

The interesting part is that even months down the line, I could still find some of those posts addressing a particular need in my own life.

That was the experience I had recently. I am ashamed to say it now but I had a heated conversation with my wife.

“Over what” you may ask? Finances, aka money!

So that was it? Yea, yea…

Is money ever enough? Well, may be when we become billionaires. Smiles 😀

Just kidding…

But seriously, we had some issues at hand: Our combined income for the month would barely be enough to accommodate ‘everything’ we wanted. No extras…

Futhermore, we couldn’t quite agree with the direction of our expenses for the following month. Our budget has to be a bit tightened due to some midyear obligations that needed to be settled.

But in a bid to have them resolved, our individual tempers flared up… Between each of us, we knew we raised our voices louder than normal.

You can hold me responsible for that. But I’m grateful to God we are both calmer now.

Just like many new couples would have experienced, this was not the first time finance and budgeting issues have come between us. And even though we always navigated our ways out of it, how come this kind of reality sometimes heat us hard in the face?

I mean, I love my wife and she loves me too. We both know it… We are eternally committed to each other. But how come we still disagree?

We are humans, imperfect humans. We are different in many ways.

We are still learning…Don’t you know that already?

Okay. That’s right!

Married couples do face challenges. Is there anyone here who doesn’t know that by now?

Well, there are bound to be issues in any relationship – be it marriage or not. But it is how we handle those issues that matters.

This was where echoes from a previous post of mine – Towards a better marriage: your spouse is not the problemreverberated loudly in my ears:

A problem is a problem and your spouse is your spouse. Please don’t mistake one for another.

I had advised my readers in that post:

“Next time you have any marital issue, be sure to remind yourself that your spouse is not the problem. Identify what the issue is and focus on tackling it. That way you will achieve a healthier method of resolution than blaming your spouse.”

In this case, I knew exactly what the problem was. And it was not my wife!

During marital problems, identify what the issue is and focus on tackling it. Don’t trade blames [with your spouse. It will backfire].

It finally felt like I was talking to my point of need as well. And I was…

As I said before, ministry to self before ministry to others! I get it: my blog post has spoken to me personally once again!

Here is an excerpt from the post that came back hunting me:

Your Spouse Is Not The Problem

Just like every married couple might have come to realise, I am sure you already know that marriage is not a bed full of roses only. It is full of plenty challenges as well.

Isn’t that pretty obvious?

More often than not, it is how you handle these challenges that will go to a large extent to determine the success and happiness or otherwise of your marital experience.

The common saying that as you make your bed, so you will lie on it holds true in marriage relationships too.

Except you are married to the devil personified, I am free to say that your spouse is not the problem. So resist the temptation to see him or her as one.

Put in proper perspective, you will realise that the challenges you have in marriage are things or issues, not a person – and definitely not your spouse!

For instance, the problem could be the manner your spouse is handling an issue at hand, or it may also be the manner you are reacting to it. Either way, you must [realise] that the problem is not a person.

A vital key to amicably resolving the challenges is to learn to focus on tackling the issue at hand rather than putting the blame on a person – your partner. You may have been hurt by what your spouse said or did at some point, but the problem is still not your spouse.

“I love you but I hate how you treat me sometimes,” a thoughtful wife once said to her husband.

You’ve got the point? Identify what the issue is and deal with it [accordingly].

A problem is a problem and your spouse is your spouse. Please don’t mistake one for another.


Which of your blog post has ever spoken to you personally? You can paste the link in the comment section. I promise to check it out and leave you a feedback.


©Copyright 2018 | Victor Uyanwanne

Advertisements