WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY, BLAME THIS GUY
By Victor Uyanwanne
Everyone wants to be happy in life but not everyone is happy. You don’t need to look hard enough around you in your family, workplace, church and neighbourhoods to find huge evidences to support that assertion.
I once rode on a public bus in Lagos, Nigeria, with someone who claimed she didn’t want to be wealthy in life. Of course she stated her reasons, even though I felt differently about her position after listening to her. But I am yet to meet anyone who doesn’t want to be happy in life.
In this article, I do not mean to explain why people are not as happy as they should. But it is my objective to point out who people should not blame if they find that they are not as happy as can be.
Have you not noticed that most people who are not happy blame other people but themselves for not being happy? I don’t know about you, as for me, I know that I would not feel nice if someone blamed me for his unhappiness.
Please be honest with me now, how would you feel if other people blamed their unhappiness on you? I am sure you would not like it too! So if you don’t like other people blaming their unhappiness on you, never feel justified to blame your own unhappiness on other people.
If you are not happy as a husband/wife, don’t blame it on your spouse.
That has to be said because it seems to be natural to blame someone else once anything goes wrong.
“Whatever you do with your life don’t blame me,” an angry mum once said to her wayward teenager. That sounds like a familiar tune in some families.
Right or wrong, even you may have someone you may readily feel is responsible for your unhappiness. But blaming someone else for your unhappiness will not cause you to be truly happy.
Here now is the big question: If you are not happy in life, who should you blame? The answer is…………… NO ONE!
Actually, a better advice would be that you should take responsibility for your perceived unhappiness and snap yourself out of it. I am not saying it’s easy but it can be done. No one can do it for you except you.
In a previous post on this blog, it was asserted that the key to your happiness is in your hands – not in the hands of another person. As everyone is responsible for his own destiny, so is everyone responsible for his own happiness. That is to say, if you are not happy, don’t blame another person.
But what do we see in people who are not happy? They blame others for their unhappiness! Unhappy mothers blame their children. Unhappy children blame their parents. An unhappy spouse blames the other half, and so on and so forth.
Should it always be so? My candid answer would be a huge NO. Here are my summarized takes on it:
If you are not happy as an employee, don’t blame it on your employer.
- If you are not happy as a citizen of your country, don’t blame it on your Government.
- If you are not happy as a teacher, don’t blame it on your students.
- If you are not happy as a student, don’t blame it on your teacher.
- If you are not happy as a husband/wife, don’t blame it on your spouse.
If you are not happy as a child, don’t blame it on your parents.
- If you are not happy as a parent, don’t blame it on your children.
- If you are not happy as a player, don’t blame it on your coach.
- If you are not happy as a team member, don’t blame it on your other team members.
- If you are not happy as a pastor, don’t blame it on your congregation.
- If you are not happy as a member of your congregation, don’t blame it on your pastor.
Most importantly if you are not happy with your life, don’t blame it on God.
You have read my thoughts. Please feel free to share yours. I will be glad to read your comments.
© Copyright | Victor Uyanwanne